The way to harmony may be shared meals, according to a new survey. Jaine Blackman reports on what people think are the ingredients for contentment

The key to domestic bliss in Oxford is four meals together a week, it’s claimed.

A study into the home lives of 2,000 families explored the aspects that lead to a happy life and found making the effort to eat together, a trip away every few months and having both sets of grandparents close by as big factors.

But while electronic gadgets and TVs may have been further down the list than hugs and laughing a lot, intentions don’t always match reality.

Despite the importance of eating together proving the most popular source for a happy family, a third said they rarely find time to do this, according to the survey commissioned by Origin, a manufacturer of folding doors, windows and blinds.

“I have to agree wholeheartedly with the number one finding on the list,” says Jason Ayres, of Bicester, author of the Stay At Home Dad Diaries, whose latest novel My Tomorrow, Your Yesterday has recently been published.

“Eating together is one of the best things that you can do as a family for so many reasons, preferably away from the television and without electronic devices on hand.

“It’s a great shame to read that a third of families cannot find time to do this.”

Jason, who is married to Claire, and has two sons – Ollie, seven, and Jamie, four, says: “It’s unrealistic in these days of varying work patterns and lifestyles to be able to do this every single day but we manage it around four times a week.

“The benefits of all sitting around the table together are numerous.

“Firstly, it’s a real opportunity to talk without distractions about the events of the day.

“It’s much better from a healthy eating perspective too.

“When cooking for four, I can make proper home-made meals from scratch such as roast dinners and casseroles.

“It’s much better than just grabbing a snack or a ready meal on the hoof.

“The children are far more likely to eat healthily if we are all eating together and it’s also an opportunity to introduce new foods – never easy when you have an autistic child, but an area we have made steady progress in over the past few years.

Mum-of-four and former BBC executive turned children’s novelist Cas Lester, of Water Eaton, says the “fabulous” feel good list reminds her “how brilliant it is being part of a family”.

“I agree with all of them – especially eating together and playing together – but not only board games!

“And remembering that a family is a group of individuals – so give everyone ‘one to one’ time and time on their own – bathtime, bedtime, going for a walk. And that includes the parents!”

The 40 tips for domestic bliss

1. All eating together
2. Laughing a lot
3. Keeping the home tidy
4. Feeling safe and secure
5. Hugs
6. Enough sofas for everyone
7. Making time for each other
8. Regular family trips out
9. Knowing when to say sorry
10. A family pet
11. Nice neighbours
12. No rows in front of the kids
13. A big garden
14. Cooking with the children
15. Helping the kids with their homework
16. Not having secrets
17. Movie nights
18. Playing board games
19. Putting the kids’ paintings on the walls
20. Sharing chores
21. Everyone picking their clothes up off of the floor
22. Having lots of photos together around the house
23. Knowing when someone wants to be left alone
24. Having a treat cupboard
25. Having a play room for the kids
26. Having a big TV in the lounge
27. Having fast Wi-Fi
28. Having ‘in’ jokes
29. A large kitchen
30. Having regular heart-to-hearts
31. Privacy from the outside world
32. Having a takeaway night every few weeks or so
33. Having a dishwasher
34. Plenty of music
35. A weekly walk
36. Nice views
37. A lock on the bathroom door
38. Having Sky TV
39. Well-lit rooms
40. Having designated days where we spend time together