Alexander Ewing will be observing from out west

These are usually the most difficult weeks for the junior dean. Freshers’ Week brings the inevitable run(s) to the John Radcliffe, despite our best efforts to recommend a more gradual introduction to university socialising for the new boys and girls.

I always cringe at the sight of seasoned third years turning up to events held for new arrivals. Every year I try to convince myself that they are doing this with the best of intentions. You see, there is always a strong element of the paternal in seasoned junior deans.

Why, then, in the first week of term have the librarians seen me, to their astonishment, waltzing into work at nine o’clock sharp?

You can also spot me relaxing in the Missing Bean at 8.30 on a Wednesday morning, the usual time of our weekly meeting.

Time to come clean. It is because I resigned.

In fact, I decided to hang up the boots a few months back, but did not want to go public with the sad news until my contract ended on October 1.

Oriel recognised my tenure at the leavers’ dinner over the summer. It was a rather awkward honorable mention next to the other leavers — two distinguished college fellows retiring after decades of service.

The junior common room also invited me to their end-of-year dinner/booze-up. It was a thoughtful gesture. After all these years, it was not an easy decision.

Even in the final stretch of my DPhil (I promise), I like to think I could have stayed on, at least in a cameo part-time role.

But every junior dean must be honest with themselves at some point in their career. I know that the legs have gone. I can no longer keep up with the enthusiastic talent coming through the youth ranks.

I offered my services in a coaching role, as the ‘welfare co-ordinator’, but there are already plenty of backroom staff. So, I had to hand over my key to the senior common room. I will miss the coffee machine terribly.

I’m still lobbying the bursar to offer me a role as ‘senior junior dean emeritus’ to entertain corporate guests at high table from time to time. And, of course, I will continue to do commentary work for Quad Talk.

The top brass will be relieved to hear that I still plan to write about Oriel life. I remain a student there. And the travails of thesis purgatory always makes good copy.

Otherwise, I’m looking for a new identity in this space.

Having recently moved to West Oxfordshire I thought about a column documenting my daily commute on the S1 bus. A lot happens when idling in horrendous traffic. Stagecoach be warned.

I also thought about doing an update on my social outings, combined with a running commentary on questionable participles in the national press.

But I realised that Christopher Gray is already employed to do this.

Overall, though, in the new academic year I look forward to writing about Oxford life with less cynicism. The students are more tolerable from afar.