AUDREY Fennymore took early retirement two years ago to pursue the hobbies she never had time for.

She is now busier than ever, but without the time constraints imposed by a job. "I've never been so happy. People might think I'm selfish but I decided this was my time the Kidlington 62-year-old explained.

But for thousands of others across Oxfordshire the milestone is viewed with a mixture of fear and loathing.

And, as recent retirees pose the third highest divorce risk, it is little wonder that so many couples regard the move with trepidation.t

Large companies are now increasingly recognising the worries their employees face - and the experts have discovered that men and women treat the experience completely differently. But what's the big deal, where are people going wrong and what can they do to ease the passage?

Derek Wildey, managing director of The Retirement Counselling Service, which advises Oxford employees and their other halves for Nationwide, Railtrack and the National Freight Company, amongst others, had some hot tips.

He said on the whole men worry about three things; money, what to do with themselves, and how to spend 24 hours a day with their spouse.

Women on the other hand mainly worry about how to keep their men occupied and out of their way. "Women are less selfish and more resilient. They have usually established some sort of routine and they don't want it disturbed by the sudden emergence of their partner. The old phrase 'twice the husband on half the money' is certainly valid," he said.

"We advise people on how to survive on a budget, what to do with the nest egg, recommend a good financial advisor, how to keep their minds active and how to adjust.

"It's a bit like being made redundant. At first they are euphoric and then anger and rejection set in because they are still able, qualified and skilled but cannot work because of their age. For others it's the loss of status."

But many companies such as B&Q are increasingly recognising these skills and recruiting the recently retired, part-time. Voluntary work is another avenue crying out for staff.

Mr Wildey, whose company counselled 5,000 employees last year alone, also encourages couples to write down what they want from retirement. "It's amazing how different these can be. But we break it down and highlight the similarities. Husbands and wives should have hobbies they do together but also separate interests so they always have something to talk about," he said.

Chief Officer of Oxford's Age Concern, Bruce Henderson, advised people to expand on their interests. "If you like gardening, think about getting an allotment. If you like walking consider travelling to national parks or taking up keep fit.

"Check at the local library - there is so much going on locally. And make plans so you can save for that special occasion, holiday or hobby."

Audrey, who used to work in the fashion retail business, doesn't know what all the fuss is about. "I decided 'this is it, girl'. I wanted to have time to stop and talk to people without my eye on the clock, to take things at a slower pace."

Her husband of 42 years is retiring in three years, but Audrey is not worried about that.

"He has got so many hobbies, a lot of which we do together, so I don't see it as a problem." HELPLINES:

Age Concern 01865 246580

University of the Third Age 01865 836588

The Retirement Counselling Service 01494 433553

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