I did not imagine that the Grass Roots Stadium in Tring, Hertfordshire would be the venue for my first pre-season game this year.

But it was.

I was playing for Hendon, a part-time club from the Ryman Premier Division.

I haven’t signed for them – it’s just part of keeping fit and ensuring I have some match sharpness in case I get that call.

I am very grateful to Gary McCann, who is a friend and also the Hendon gaffer, for allowing me to train and play with them.

But this is by no means the situation I pictured myself being in – even when I was recovering from injury last year.

After the final five games of last season, I never imagined that I would be left unwanted on the shelf.

Why though? Is it my ability? Is it my age?

Surely it is the latter, because – and I don’t want to sound arrogant – I don’t think it can be on ability.

If you ignore my age, you have a fit, strong and very good player.

So what do I do? How long do I wait around for someone to call?

My phone hasn’t rung all summer. I have had no enquiries at all.

To be honest, it makes me feel like that old mutt at Battersea Dogs Home, which everyone keeps walking past!

I have some big decisions to make.

Do I join a part-time club, even though I feel I can play higher? Or maybe I should just retire instead of dropping out of the Football League and end my proud career.

Over the past few months a lot of my peers have taken the decision to hang up their boots – top players such as Michael Owen, Jamie Carragher, Paul Scholes and David Beckham.

Of course I am not saying I am in their class.

But we did start out at roughly the same time and plenty of times over the years our paths have crossed. Owen and Carragher were my England Under 21 teammates.

They were all ready to call it a day, and all did so on their own terms.

Owen had maybe finally accepted his previous injuries were not letting his body do the things they once did.

Carragher and Scholes bowed out at the top as one-club men.

And Beckham’s illustrious career was halted after winning yet another league title with another top club in another league. But I don’t want to hang up my boots yet. I am not ready to retire.

If I quit now, I would forever question my decision – maybe even hate myself for it.

I have always had belief in my ability, but the situation I find myself is testing the strongest of willpower.

What if the phone continues not to ring? What will I do? The simple answer is I will play on – it just may not be at the standard I want, or feel, I should be at.

I am not too proud to play the game at a lower level. Pride doesn’t come into it.

I have always said I will continue to play while I still have the buzz for it and feel I can maintain the high standards I set myself.

After my game for Hendon, I still feel I love it. I loved competing and I loved winning.

My last five performances for Oxford United showed there is still plenty left in me and I’m not ready to call it a day.

This kid from Edmonton N18 started playing football because he loved it and he will continue to play for the very same reason.